We're not here right now. But if you leave a message with your name, number and time you called...

 

claudiaboleyn:

Cishets take note. 
This is victim blaming and not how you should ever speak to my community. 
This sort of speech puts the blame for LGBTQIAP+phobia on our community for simply being out. 
A basic translation is: 
We will only treat you as human if you pretend to be straight. 
If you don’t think our community has tried everything to stop the hatred and abuse against us then you need to think harder. 
The reason we still face this unacceptable bigotry is not because we refuse to be ashamed of our identities, it’s because of bigots like the tweeter above. 
Cis straight people have the privilege of being able to ‘flaunt’ their identities (aka live their lives without fear of hatred and harm on the basis of that identity) every single day. 
I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment cis straight people fear holding the hand of their significant other in public.
I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment cis straight people are denied the right to marry. 
I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment I stop hearing about friends and members of my community being made homeless by their bigoted cis heterosexual parents. 
I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment I stop hearing about members of my community being bullied, beaten, and even killed, for simply being who they are.
I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment cis straight people stop calling my sexuality a ‘disease’ I need to be cured of. 
I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment cis straight people, as a collective, can get their shit together and learn to treat me and my community like human beings. 
Cis straight people made my sexuality relevant the moment they started denying me rights and discriminating against me and my community on the basis of it. 

"I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment I stop hearing about members of my community being bullied, beaten, and even killed, for simply being who they are.”
I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment I stop hearing about Trans Women of Color being targeted for hate and murdered in the streets.

claudiaboleyn:

Cishets take note. 

This is victim blaming and not how you should ever speak to my community. 

This sort of speech puts the blame for LGBTQIAP+phobia on our community for simply being out. 

A basic translation is: 

We will only treat you as human if you pretend to be straight. 

If you don’t think our community has tried everything to stop the hatred and abuse against us then you need to think harder. 

The reason we still face this unacceptable bigotry is not because we refuse to be ashamed of our identities, it’s because of bigots like the tweeter above. 

Cis straight people have the privilege of being able to ‘flaunt’ their identities (aka live their lives without fear of hatred and harm on the basis of that identity) every single day. 

I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment cis straight people fear holding the hand of their significant other in public.

I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment cis straight people are denied the right to marry. 

I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment I stop hearing about friends and members of my community being made homeless by their bigoted cis heterosexual parents. 

I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment I stop hearing about members of my community being bullied, beaten, and even killed, for simply being who they are.

I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment cis straight people stop calling my sexuality a ‘disease’ I need to be cured of. 

I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment cis straight people, as a collective, can get their shit together and learn to treat me and my community like human beings. 

Cis straight people made my sexuality relevant the moment they started denying me rights and discriminating against me and my community on the basis of it. 

"I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment I stop hearing about members of my community being bullied, beaten, and even killed, for simply being who they are.”

I’ll stop making my sexuality relevant the moment I stop hearing about Trans Women of Color being targeted for hate and murdered in the streets.

fadedwindsxo:

This is really important. 

#WeAreYou

"We believe that our humanity defines us, not who we love, or what gender we are. We believe that the United States has a duty to uphold the words in the Declaration of Independence - "We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal…", but it’s not doing that.

iO Tillett Wright is traveling the country, photographing 10,000 people who identify as ANYWHERE on the LGBTQ spectrum (even 1% gay is enough to get you fired in 29 States). When she has 10,000 portraits, she and her team will take them to the National Mall, in front of the Washington Monument, and stage a march on Washington. This is the SELF EVIDENT TRUTHS Project.

In response to the avalanche of bigotry and misinformation about LGBTQ people, the Self Evident team created the WE ARE YOU campaign - a simple message of love and support. Wear the shirt, put up the sticker, wear the bag, HASHTAG #WEAREYOU, and let it be known that you demand that all humans be treated equally.

GET INVOLVED TODAY AT: WWW.SELFEVIDENTPROJECT.COM

BUY THE SHIRT HERE - selfevidentproject.com/store/

Bisexual men face unique challenges to their sexual health

Bisexual men have many unmet public health needs, which leave them vulnerable to sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and other health problems. This new study from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) illuminates the behavioral, interpersonal, and social realities of men who have sex with men and women (MSMW), and it explores possible interventions to better serve their needs. The findings are published today in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine.

MSMW represent a small portion of the population, with about 2% of sexually active males reporting sex with both men and women. Although low in numbers, the bisexual male population is disproportionally affected by HIV and STIs. According to study author William L. Jeffries IV, PhD, MPH, MA, factors that may affect the sexual health of MSMW include sex without condoms, early sexual debut, forced sexual encounters, increased numbers of sexual partners, substance use, exchange sex, risk behaviors of their male and female partners, and attitudes toward pregnancy. These factors shape MSMW’s vulnerability to HIV and STIs in ways that distinguish bisexual men from gay and heterosexual men. Negative attitudes toward bisexual individuals, economic barriers, masculinity norms, and the meanings associated with their sexual identities are among the social factors that may negatively influence their sexual partnerships and risks for HIV/STIs.

While HIV prevalence among MSMW is lower than among gay men, MSMW are more likely than heterosexual men to become infected with HIV. Also, MSMW are less likely than gay men to be tested for HIV, which can lead to undiagnosed HIV and transmission to partners. Along with HIV, other STIs are common among MSMW, with 21% of these men reporting STI treatment in the past year, compared to 12% for gay men and 2.3% of heterosexual men.

Dr Jeffries goes on to say…

“…desires to prevent pregnancy may prompt some MSMW to consistently use condoms with women,” Dr. Jeffries explains in the paper. “Yet, MSMW may avoid condom use when their female partners use other contraceptives or when female partners perceive condom use as a sign of relationship infidelity.”

Get Tested!

Know your HIV status!

Knowledge is power!

(Source: tumblr.com)

What About Protection For LGBT Families??

#MarriageEquality What About Protection For #LGBT Families?? We’ve come a long way, baby. #PrideMonth

*Note: this piece has been sitting in my drafts folder for almost a year. Since then the U.S. Supreme Court has deemed The Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) unconstitutional and several more states have struck down their anti-same sex marriage laws. A lot has changed since I wrote it, but the sentiment remains. I’ve witnessed the damage that happens to gay couples because they didn’t have the legal protections afforded to their heterosexual counterparts. This isn’t about hurting straight couples. This is about protecting LGBT couples. Nothing more.

====================================

Anyone who has lived through the height of the AIDS crisis understands why Same Sex Marriage is necessary.

I’ve witnessed countless gay men lose everything as the families of their deceased partners swooped in like vultures, devouring everything in sight. It reminded me of the peasants picking through Scrooge’s things in the Dickens classic, A Christmas Carol. These family members weren’t close to the deceased. In most cases they had disowned their gay son. Some were so fearful of AIDS that they refused to come visit their son or brother in the hospital, leaving the survivor to care for his sick partner alone. — Strange. Where was their fear of HIV/AIDS when they were picking through the dead man’s belongings?

It pissed me off to no end seeing these cowards walk in after the fact and claim property simply because they were family. Where was their “Family Values” when their relative was sick??

One woman had the arrogance to tell a friend of mine that his 15 year relationship with her brother was nothing more than playing house. “My husband and I have been married for ten years,” she said. “You two may have lived together, but it was not love.” WHAT?? Was she out of her friggin mind??

One of my friends challenged his deceased partner’s family. The father, who was a lawyer, told his son’s partner, “I have infinite resources. You will go bankrupt if you try to challenge me.” My friend’s case never made it to court. He was forced to move less than a year later.

Those are just two examples of the complete disregard for and discrimination of LGBT families. Did you know it is legal to fire someone simply because he or she is Gay in 29 states? Twenty-Nine States! That’s the reason ENDA is so important. AND… Gays and Lesbians can be DENIED housing in another 29 states. What the hell!

“But what about the children?”

Yeah. Conservatives love to hold children hostage over every issue they don’t approve of. For some reason, they think legalizing Same-Sex Marriage will somehow interfere with the raising of their children. I don’t understand the resistance to educating children, in an age appropriate way, about the world around them. Besides, what of the Gay and Lesbian couples who are raising children? Where is the protection for their families?

If the foundation or your marriage so fragile that it would crumble under the weight of another couple’s happiness, I feel sorry for you.

Here’s the thing. Same Sex Marriage is a conservative idea. It’s personal liberty. It’s “Family Values”

Fifteen years ago, when the idea of Same-Sex Marriage was in it’s infancy, I may have settled for Civil Unions, but Civil Unions are NOT equal to Marriage. A Marriage grants you 1,138 federal rights, protections and responsibilities   A Civil Union does not.

Depending on which state you live, it will cost you between $50 and $100 for a Marriage license. In order to acquire some of (but not all) those rights an LGBT couple must hire a lawyer and spend hundreds, maybe thousands of dollars. Why do I need to make a lawyer rich just to enjoy the same rights as any two strangers can get just because they said, “I Do” at a Las Vegas Drive-Thru wedding chapel?

==================================

It heartens me to see that we have accomplished so much since I first drafted this post. At this moment nineteen states and the District of Columbia have given the ‘go ahead’ to same sex marriage. We still have a long way to go, but I cannot overlook the accomplishments of just this last year. LGBTs and their allies have much to be proud of.

Happy Pride Month Everybody!

View On ADignorantum.WordPress

spirantization:

you can’t be a bisexual if you’ve never dated a girl. all bisexuals must submit proof of dating history before becoming fully licensed and must be registered to continue practicing bisexuality. please renew your license every 5 years to avoid reclassification as hetero- or homosexual and to remain eligible for our annual picnic and raffle.

This applies to everyone but Steve.

…poor Steve. :(

Dear LGBTQIA…BCDEFG Community,

Dear #LGBTQIA… BCDEFG Community; Exploring the ever expanding, all inclusive acronym that represents our community.

Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning, Intersex… I’m confused. Is the A for Ally or Asexual?

Can we please do something about this ever expanding alphabet soup of an acronym that we have come to embrace? It’s getting a little confusing and frankly, a little ridiculous. Seriously, every time I turn around it seems like we’ve tacked on another letter! I understand that it’s all part of the inclusiveness that our community is supposed to be embracing — and that’s a beautiful thing — but all it really does is confuse everyone except for those whose letter is represented.

How about choosing one all-inclusive word to encompass everyone? I liked gay but it’s become synonymous with homosexual men. So, it isn’t really all-inclusive anymore.

“Sexual minority” is all encompassing, though probably a little too clinical. You could maybe shorten it to the “SM” community but apparently, there already is an SM community.

Way back in the 1990s, some of the kids reclaimed “queer” but that word still holds negative connotations to me. It’s just as bad as that six letter F word. No, we need something optimistic, something bright, something trendy and cool. Like… The Rainbow Community!” …No? You don’t like it? To be honest, neither do I. It brings to mind Rainbow Brite, My Little Pony, or worse… the Smurfs! Come to think of it, Papa Smurf does have that ‘daddy bear’ vibe. He’d probably fit right in at your friendly neighborhood leather bar.

The thing is, members of the LGBTQIA community come from all walks of life. Every ethnicity and socioeconomic background is represented within our community. We are a microcosm of the world! As such, each subgroup needs to be represented so that young LGBTQIA people don’t feel isolated within their own communities. It’s simpler than it sounds. Growing up gay, lesbian, or trans* can be a very lonely thing. Isolation leads to depression. Depression often leads to suicide. When you recognize the importance of representation, suddenly the alphabet soup doesn’t seem so bad.

So, I guess I can live with the ever expanding, all inclusive, acronym that has come to represent our equally varied and colorful community.

parada gay

They say variety is the spice of life.

It certainly makes life more interesting.

Happy Pride Month Everybody!

Read more

Anonymous asked
Hey, I am a gay girl born into a Muslim family. The only time I was ever "religious" was as a kid when I was first learning about Islam. Growing up, I went through a lot and started losing faith. Now I feel like I cannot go back to the religion even if I wanted to because of my sexuality. I will never be accepted. I also feel like Islam prioritizes men and as a feminist that goes against what I believe in. Is there still room for me in this religion or should I start searching for another faith?

occupiedmuslim:

Hey so I crowdsourced a lot of this answer: [updating as I get more suggestions and resources]

Personally, I couldn’t be a Muslim and follow Islam if I didn’t find it feminist, full of social justice and intersectional. Unfortunately patriarchy and self interest tries to pass itself off as moralistic and religious —this is universal. Also it’s helpful to keep in mind that if any authority tries to tell you to hate and discriminate know that it isn’t from God or any moral compass—but fear. 

O you who have attained to faith! Be ever steadfast in upholding equity, bearing witness to the truth for the sake of God, even though it be against your own selves or your parents and kinsfolk. Whether the person concerned be rich or poor, God’s claim takes precedence over [the claims of] either of them. Do not, then, follow your own desires, lest you swerve from justice: for if you distort [the truth], behold, God is indeed aware of all that you do!

- The Holy Qur’an [4:135]

believe the Prophet Muhammad [saw] was a radical-feminist-environmental anti-racist community organizer, activist and freedom fighter that believed in freeing people from the status quo and freeing them from oppression through Islam and Allah [swt]. And I believe in following that tradition.

“Truly, God does not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves.” (Quran 13:11)

I believe it was Aisha [ra] that had a close friend that was a hijra and didn’t wear a hijab, or covering around them. There was plenty of queer people in and around the Prophet Muhammad’s [s] life time.

I could name-drop Sufi saints and poets from various times and places who violated norms of gender and sexuality on one level or another. Ali ibn Hamzah al-Asadi, more widely known as al-Kisa’i al-Kufi (d.804). As the transmitter of one of the Qur’an’s seven harfs (“readings”) in Sunni tradition, he’s an immeasurably important figure in the history of the Qur’an as a text. As such, his knowledge and character were both under close examination. In one assessment, al-Marzubani, speaking on the authority Ibn al-Arabi (the jurist, not the mystic), described al-Kisa’i as “one of the most learned persons” while adding that al-Kisa’i openly confessed to engaging in acts that included same-sex relations. “Yet,” he adds, al-Kisa’i remained “an accurate reader, knowledgeable in the Arabic language, and honest.” 

This does not answer all questions, but it offers something. In Sunni Islam, there are seven canonical ways of reading the Qur’an. Al-Kisa’i al-Kufi is the man who gave us one of them. He devoted his life to knowing and teaching the Qur’an. It should go without saying that al-Kisa’i al-Kufi memorized the entire scripture by heart and recited it every day of his life. Along the way, he apparently fucked dudes. The lips that he used to recite divine scripture also touched men.

“O people, we created you all from a male and female
And made you into different communities and different tribes
So that you should come to know one another
Acknowledging that the most noble among you 
Is the one most aware of God
Qur’an 49:13
The most noble is the one most aware of God. This is not just incitement for all Muslims to increase their awareness of God – it is also a warning to pursue a policy of social tolerance. The implication of this verse is that no Muslim is better than another because of any of the social categories that we use to classify ourselves, such as race, ethnicity, economic class, or gender. Or even sexual orientation. A gay or lesbian Muslim is no less than a heterosexual Muslim, except by the intangible criterion of pious awareness of God (taqwa). A transgender
Muslim is no less than other Muslims who have not struggled with their own gender identity and faced the stigma of changing gender classification, except by awareness of God. 
Most Muslims cherish reciting this verse to oppose the evils of racial superiority, ethnic chauvinism, and class arrogance. Yet some see this verse as a call to justice that rings far beyond its terse words.”
Scott Siraj al-Haqq Kugle, HOMOSEXUALITY IN ISLAM


El-Farouk Khaki, the founder of Salaam [a queer Muslim organization in Canada] says:  you can connect her w me, or with Daayiee Abdullahmy email is elfin925@rogers.com she can also join https://www.facebook.com/groups/99769188589/  el-Tawhid Juma Circle: Toronto Unity Mosque & learn that there is no singular, monolith Islam, and that for some, Islam is liberationary.

EFK and the rest of the leaders at el-Tawhid Juma Circle: Toronto Unity Mosque make a point of emphasising the spiritual aspects of Islam and reducing focus on external elements.

Imam Daayiee Abdullah contact [the gay Imam in DC] (daayiee@aol.com). 

There’s also an Imam in Canada, TO who I know is pro-feminist, cool with gay Muslims and he asked me to give you his number if you would like it.

Some points

1) If you believe that God created you the way are, you can’t possible believe that God would reject you
2) The community you grew up in does not necessarily represent Islam
3) The beauty of Islam is that there is no intercession between you and God. You has every right and ability to pick up the Quran and find out what it means to you. 
4) If you find things you can’t reconcile, you should speak to others who have found themselves in a similar situation.
5) thefatalfeminist.com is a great starting point and introduction to feminism, Islam and social justice.
6) Islam does not prioritize men over women, the patriarchal actualization of Islam as seen through socially constructed norms prioritizes men over women, but that is a product of kyriarchy more than anything. If you want your faith to prioritize women, then do it. 
7) Hit up Scott Kugle at Emory who could give you some nice readings and independent studies for Lesbianism or Queer identities and Islam.

This post pretty much came about because I was asked if I had resources for Muslims who were discovering or newly coming to terms with their sexuality. I didn’t, and the poor advice I had to offer was … poor. So, I pulled up a few of the blogs I followed that are targeted towards queer Muslims, and put together this little post for you!

Queer Muslim Blogs:

Queer Muslim 101:

A good thing to remember is to avoid the self-hatred phase, if you can. Focus on loving yourself, and realising that Allah made you just the way you are, and that you are loved. If this phase is unavoidable, here are some helpful sites:

If you are a student and would like to get Faisal Alam to speak at your uni, or to see if he is coming to your uni soon, click here.

If you would like to attend Faisal Alam’s 2013 Retreat for Queer Muslims and their partners, here is the facebook event, and here is more info. Register for the retreat here.

If you are from Indonesia, Pakistan, Bangladesh, or India and want to share your experiences (anonymously), please click here.

If you can spare some funds, help navigatethestream, a queer Muslim, become an Imam to help the Muslim LGBT* community!

Lastly, here is a link if you are NOT a queer Muslim, but want to be a good ALLY! (And here is another on how NOT to be a saviour!)

Muslim-Queer-Friendly Blogs:

(If you’d like to be added to or taken off this list, please send me an ask.)

More papers/books not previously mentioned:

Reblogging this for my LGBT friends of faith who may find themselves in the same crisis.

Do not let religious leaders come between you and God.

I’ve mentioned in the past that I am agnostic. Because my belief in a supreme being is complicated, does not mean I have a right to interfere with the faith of others. No man has that power. — ADignorantium
































Spirit Day 2013: What to Do If You’re LGBTQ and Bullied 







by Lambda Legal


Today is Spirit Day!
For a lot of LGBTQ students, those perceived to be LGBTQ and the friends of LGBTQ students, bullying is a serious reality. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be stopped. You have a legal right to be who you are and to be safe.

For more see Lambda Legal
Spirit Day 2013: What to Do If You’re LGBTQ and Bullied